The Sweetest of Holidays

I walk around with a smile plastered on my silly face these days. I am drunk with hope and joy.  Anger and hurt feelings I use to nurse religiously have melted away.

Why?

I have a job.

Miracle of miracles – a job.

The answer to a million prayers – a job.

If you are unemployed you know the sheer depth of  that word.

The simple joy of going to work will be mine.

This past year has been the most challenging of my life. For months I barely moved, frozen in fear of losing everything.  Every noise frightened me – were they taking my car, turning off my utilities or serving legal papers?  I cried myself to sleep more nights than I can count; many days I thought I couldn’t go on.  I felt a failure, a terrible, awful failure.

But I did go on, sometimes in tears and more often than not a mess of tangled emotions.  How I made it through is a miracle. I always had food. I kept my car. I managed to keep looking for work and be positive for interviews.

How?

Through the grace and love of friends.

Friends who called me to let me know they knew what I was going through. Friends who fed me, paid a bill, or two, or more.  And my mom who never stopped listening and caring for me – even though she is a little forgetful at times.

I am so lucky, so blessed.

From the bottom of my heart – thank you.

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17 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. IPINTOLE
    Dec 21, 2008 @ 05:07:07

    CONGRATULATIONS! Reading your post made me feel comforted, so I thank you for sharing the fantastic news. Things fall into place when they have to; I am glad the right time came for you.

    Your reference to gratitude, prayers, friends and miracles makes me reflect on those same words too; congratulations again and may the year 2009 be as fantastic as it should.

    Best,

    Ignacio Pinto-Leon

    Ignacio – thank you for stopping by and for commenting. I wrote often about how hard things were – in the midst of it sometimes it seemed like it would never end. Hope is essential to going through hard times and friends are essential to keeping it alive.

    Reply

  2. Shelagh
    Dec 21, 2008 @ 07:35:52

    What a lovely gift! Especially in these trying times. I wish all the best for you and a Happy 2009!
    Cheers, Shelagh

    Shelagh – thank you. I’ve just been catching up on your blog. It is like having a small vacation – you get to see pretty things that restore your soul. One of the joys of being employed is that I will be able to participate in charitable giving again. Your 3 Cups of Tea fundraiser was wonderful.

    Reply

  3. Jennifer
    Dec 21, 2008 @ 11:34:33

    Congrats! I am so excited for you. I started last year with a new job and it was the best holiday present I received.

    Jenn – thank you for stopping by and commenting. You are right about the present thing – it makes all the difference in the world. The fact that this is the kind of job I have looked for for the past 8 years makes it all the more sweet.

    Reply

  4. lornarichman
    Dec 22, 2008 @ 12:41:28

    One of my holiday cards said “Celebrate new beginnings.” It must have been your fortune cookie, eh?

    May the blessings of good health, peace and joy be yours.

    Lorna – your friendship and place in my family of spirit brings joy to my heart. You have given me tow of the most wonderful gifts I have ever received, Mittens, and the writing seminar with Natalie Goldberg. I will be forever grateful.

    Reply

  5. Becky
    Dec 22, 2008 @ 14:32:48

    Wonderful, wonderful news! I’m so happy to hear this!

    Becky – your writing provided the humor I needed on more than one occasion. Thank you for all that write (ad put out there) every day. I look forward to making a trip to Chicago sometime soon and maybe buying you a drink (while I hold the baby!).

    Reply

  6. Liz
    Dec 22, 2008 @ 16:52:09

    Congtatulations! This is my first visit, and I’m glad I was able to stop by to share in your success. Good luck with the new job!

    Liz – thank you for stopping by and commenting. I’ve just been exploring your blog and look forward to updates on your adoption journey.

    Reply

  7. Cheryl
    Dec 22, 2008 @ 18:33:45

    Oh honeypie!! I’m SOOOOOOoooooOOOO happy to hear this news. I’ve been thinking about you so much the last few days, thinking I haven’t seen you in my twitter stream in ages, and that I need to stop by your blog. And on the very day I do? I get to read this wonderful post. Hooray!!

    Happy holidays lady! You deserve it.
    🙂

    C ~ (@jasperblu)

    Cheryl – thank you. I have been checking out your blog regularly and love the photos of your “little turtle.” I wish all good things for both of you in the new year.

    Reply

  8. Becca
    Dec 23, 2008 @ 01:25:00

    Mazel Tov again. I am overjoyed for you! Happy Hannukah & thanks for spreading the light!

    Becca – thank you (again!) and I look forward to a great new year!

    Reply

  9. Ouyang Dan
    Dec 24, 2008 @ 18:28:27

    I lurk occasionally, and wanted to pop in to congratulate you.

    Dan – thank you. I appreciate your reading and commenting.

    Reply

  10. amandalinn
    Dec 25, 2008 @ 13:28:46

    This is great! You’ve been on my mind. I’m very happy for you 😀

    Thank you – I felt everyone’s support and prayers.

    Reply

  11. pamajama
    Dec 25, 2008 @ 13:38:56

    Several days later I’m still thinking that hearing you got a job was one of the best gifts I’ve received all season:) xo

    Pam – I have to share that when the first job offer came in (and I was pretty sure I would get the other) my 18 year old son and I held each other and wept. This is not an exaggeration -it is a simple

    he heartache and pain of this long year has been almost unbearable for me; I knew he suffered to, but the full expanse of it was not evident until I saw how the news changed him. He smiles with his whole heart now and he feels free to enjoy his own wonderful experiences. He doesn’t have to feel guilt that his happiness somehow is a betrayal.

    I also cannot emphasize enough the kindness that your encouragement (and from other bloggers as well) meant to me in the darkest moments of this journey.

    Form the bottom of my heart – thank you!

    Reply

  12. darrylepollack
    Dec 25, 2008 @ 22:39:54

    Thanks to Twitter I knew this when it happened but I feel just as joyous to read about it now, here. Glad you decided to write about your job so everyone can celebrate with you. Your feeling of hope and gratitude is contagious.
    Congratulations again and 2009 will be a great year for you. Much happiness, happy hanukkah, happy new year…

    Darryle – thank you again – it is an awesome feeling knowing that I will have something meaningful to do, and that, that something will allow me the luxury of keeping food on the table and a roof over our head.

    Reply

  13. bluesuit12
    Dec 27, 2008 @ 18:22:45

    I am so excited and happy for you!!!!! (insert loud, excited, jump and down scream here!) What an awesome gift to get for you and your family and just in time for a new beginning in a New Year.

    Reply

  14. Carolyn Bahm
    Dec 28, 2008 @ 19:56:39

    I missed this news on Twitter but am so glad to be grinning on your behalf right now. Congratulations on the new job!

    Reply

  15. Christopher Barzak
    Jan 07, 2009 @ 22:53:52

    I know I already said it privately, but again, congratulations, and I just want to say this won’t be to your benefit alone, but to the place you’ll be coming to work as well. I know you’re in Cleveland, but since we met a little over a year ago, I’ve thought from time to time that despite the miles between where you come from and where you are, there is a piece of you here still, and this community will be better for having you in it again.

    Happy New Year to us all. 🙂

    Reply

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