Not yet Daddy – Reflections on Mortality

I am wide awake at this ungodly hour because my body and soul are restless. That, and there seems to be a party of sorts going on next door; I looked over and believe me, for all the noise, it sure isn’t much of a party.

img2652

Not much of a party, but loud

I decided to write, but I fear with my fatigue and general irritability, it will come to no good.

What the hell, it is just a blog, and further more it is my blog, so write I will, and critics be dammed, I am going to click publish.

A year or two before he died they had a party

A year or two before he died they had a party

Today is November 25th – this morning my father will have been dead for 40 years.

That is a long time.

My mother outlives him yet, even though as she gets closer to 90 her fragility increases with each passing day. She thinks about death more and more, although I am quite sure she is no hurry to make that journey.

I wonder, does he wait for her on the other side?

My mother says that November is by far the grayest and dumbest month of the year. I agree with her, if it weren’t for the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade I would stay in bed the whole month.

Drunk.

Daddy, rest in peace, but you can’t have her yet.

Advertisements

3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. pamajama
    Nov 26, 2008 @ 04:11:37

    Wow – 40 years seems crazy, although when I start counting I realize mine is gone 38. I think you should post a time & have all your readers down a shot for your father:)

    I love the idea of him waiting on the other side:) We watched Bonnie & Clyde the other night & rather than be sad at the end I thought, “At least they got to go togehter & it was quick.” It’s all about the perspective – if only I could always rationalize that well.

    You know next year I think I will do that – have everybody down a shot for him (then throw money our their car windows – because that is what he did the one time he was drunk!

    Reply

  2. Barbara
    Nov 26, 2008 @ 07:53:35

    That was a very touching tribute. I’m so glad you hit publish!

    I still think it was kind of a sucky post but I stand firm in my decision to publish.

    Reply

  3. Becky
    Nov 26, 2008 @ 15:27:26

    I’m with Barbara. Thank you for sharing this post with us.

    I hate November, too. It’s simply an awful month.

    November sucked but so far December is better – and that makes me happy.

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: